Sixteen Failed Attempts to Write a Eulogy for My Father

Sixteen Failed Attempts to Write a Eulogy for My Father (2024)

I recount the sixteen failed attempts to write a eulogy for my father, a man who died alone in a hotel room after alienating everyone he knew. Struggling to reconcile my love and hatred, I reflect on his history of violence, drug abuse, and the tragic parallels between his death and that of Valerie Solanas. This is a raw exploration of grief, family trauma, and the difficulty of finding compassion for someone who caused so much pain.

"I couldn't hold us both on the same plane — if I loved him, I would have to hate myself, and vice versa."